


Already Proud

by Sneakyfox55



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Brotherly Love, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Mental Breakdown, POV Second Person, Protective Papyrus (Undertale), Self-Esteem Issues, Slight Dissociation, implied depression, mentioned nightmares
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-24
Updated: 2019-08-24
Packaged: 2020-09-25 04:42:21
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,144
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20370865
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sneakyfox55/pseuds/Sneakyfox55
Summary: You had always wanted your brother to do more with his life; and you also knew it was hard for him sometimes, regardless of the circumstances.You didn't blame him, of course. That was simply how it was for him. You knew it wasn't his fault....You just wished he knew that too.





	Already Proud

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Hairline Fractures](https://archiveofourown.org/works/10764687) by [kaliawai512](https://archiveofourown.org/users/kaliawai512/pseuds/kaliawai512). 

The minute you walk in, you know something’s wrong.

For one, he’s not in his usual place on the couch, watching T.V. Normally, you’d praise him for something like that; for actually _doing_ something with his time, maybe. But something tells you it’s not because he wants to. Something tells you this isn’t right.

Carefully, you set your bags on the table and pull off your boots, then call out once. No response, which you pretty much expected, but you also realize how deathly silent the house is. It makes you uneasy, more than you thought it would.

Regardless of where you’ve been in your lifetime, you were always used to hearing something. Even if it was just white noise, or wind, it was still _something_.

This was... Nothing.

You try not to hurry up the stairs too quickly, but end up practically running anyway and stop in front of his door. You rap your gloved hand against the door three times, then pause. No sound. This time, you call out for him again (more frantically than you wish), and hear a slight noise of shifting on the other side of the door. Relief fills your soul and you force your breathing to remain calm as you say his name again, gently. Another pause. Then, what sounded like a small sigh, and...

“...come in,” he says.

You oblige and open the door. His room is dark, and stuffy-smelling, like you expected it to be. You almost don’t see him until you look to the side. His back is pressed up against the wall, eyes void and hollow, and stays perfectly still even knowing you’re there. That’s probably a bad thing, you decide.

“I’M SORRY,” you say. “I SHOULD HAVE CALLED YOU.”

Even in the darkness, you can see him staring at you, his eye-sockets still blank. “s’ok,” he says softly, and you have a feeling he means it. You don’t want him to mean it.

“NO, IT ISN’T.” Shutting the door quietly behind you, you sink to the floor beside him, your own eye-sockets pained. “I KNOW YOU’RE REALLY HURTING. I SHOULD HAVE MADE SURE YOU WERE OKAY. OR, AT LEAST... NOT LIKE YOU ARE NOW.”

At that, his eye-lights return, dim and small as they may be. His expression is no longer blank as he meets your gaze, and his grin is very strained, but at least he’s not dissociating as much. “i-it’s okay,” he repeats. “i... didn’t ask for anything. s’my fault.”

No. No, it isn’t. You wish he’d believe that, and you wish you could tell him that, but... “PLEASE, DON’T SAY THAT.” There’s a moment of silence before you continue cautiously, “DID YOU HAVE ANOTHER NIGHTMARE?”

He nods, slowly and shakily to the point where it looked nothing like a nod. “i-it,” he tries, turning away, “i-i know i shouldn’t’ve, but...”

“IT’S NOT YOUR FAULT, BROTHER.”

It’s hard to tell, but his eyes fill up with tears, and he turns back to face you. “but you want me to _try_, try to be happy, a-and to believe in myself but i don’t know if i can, i try so _hard_ but i can’t and—”

Your arms are already around him before he breaks off into a sob, and gently, carefully, you pull him into your lap. “I KNOW YOU’RE TRYING,” you murmur, one hand wiping away his tears as the other is wrapped around him. “I KNOW, SANS.”

“b-but i want to... i _need_ to...” He practically collapses against your chest, as his voice nearly rises to a wail. “i owe it to you,” he chokes out, trying to wrap his own arms around your torso in a desperate hug. “y-you’ve done so much for me, Pap, i... all you want is for me to be happy but i can’t. i’m sorry, i’m so sorry, i just... i can’t do this, Papy, i can’t...”

“I KNOW, BROTHER,” you say once more. “I’M NOT ASKING YOU TO. WE’LL TAKE IT ONE STEP AT A TIME.”

“but i haven’t done _anything_—_nothing_, nothing to make you proud of me, o-or...”

Your soul feels heavier than you ever thought it would, and you only just now realize tears are running down your own cheekbones. Carefully, as though you might hurt him if you squeezed even a little too hard, you move him away to face you. “I _AM_ PROUD OF YOU, SANS,” you whisper, smiling gently at him.

His white eye-lights stare at you, having shrunk further into his sockets, and he is visibly shivering. “h-huh?” he manages, voice cracking.

You pull him close again and rest your skull on his own, nuzzling it. “YOU’VE COME SO FAR, SANS,” you tell him. “YOU MAY NOT REALIZE IT, BUT YOU HAVE. DESPITE EVERYTHING, YOU’RE STILL HERE, AND... AND FOR THAT, I AM SO, _SO_ PROUD OF YOU.”

“...you... you are?”

“OF COURSE I AM, BONEHEAD,” you murmur affectionately. “I COULD NEVER BE MORE PROUD.”

He blinks at you, still wide-eyed. Then, he lets out a small sniffle, and rests his head on you once more.

After that, he doesn’t say much, and you don’t really expect him to, either. He seems content simply to hold onto you, and you’re content to hold him, rubbing your hand up and down his back tenderly as you whisper words of comfort. At some point, after he’s fallen silent, you almost believe he’s asleep; but then he looks up at you, weary yet fond.

“thanks, bro,” he says softly. His grin is just as tired as the rest of him, but it seems genuine now, which makes you feel significantly better. “i, heh... i owe ya big time.”

He really doesn’t, but you don’t say that. “YOU CAN MAKE IT UP TO ME BY GETTING SOME REST,” you tell him firmly. “_ACTUAL_ REST, NOT THOSE SCATTERED NAPS OF YOURS, OKAY?”

He laughs, so you think it was the right thing to say. “yeah, sure.”

You don’t let him go quite just yet, and instead hold him securely as you get to your feet. You head with him towards the door, but he asks you where you’re taking him, so you respond with a, “WELL, YOU’RE NOT GOING TO GET ANY VALUABLE REST _HERE_.” He snorts but doesn’t complain, and lets you carry him to your own room.

Somewhere between switching rooms, he manages to fall asleep in your hold—which, of course, doesn’t surprise you at all—and you have no problem tucking him into your bed. You consider leaving, but ultimately, you settle yourself beside him on the bed, and he wakes up for a moment just to drowsily mumble, “love you.”

You roll your eyes half-heartedly, then mutter a quick “I LOVE YOU TOO, YOU LAZYBONES,” before wrapping your arms around him again.

For once, you don’t mind sleeping in a little the next day.

**Author's Note:**

> WHAT IT'S UNDERTALE???
> 
> ok but on a serious note, i actually have like a ton of undertale stories that i started a while back but just never posted, mostly on account of being too "embarrassed" by them, or not thinking them note-worthy enough to post. I've been working specifically on ones recently though that I want to be able to post (mainly to have variety among my Warriors stuff, lol). 
> 
> So here, an average short Undertale fanfic that I started a few nights ago and just now finished. I see a lot of Undertale fanfictions portraying Papyrus as being somewhat unaware of Sans's mental health (which is all fine, not saying that's bad), so I kind of wanted to make my own spin on their relationship in that regard. I also made it mostly to cheer myself up but I'm okay now haha. Admittedly, this was inspired by kaliawai512's Hairline Fractures so PLEASE go check that one out, it's so good and way better than this thing haha. Just go check out her stories in general, they're all awesome.
> 
> Okay, now please excuse me while I go take a breather. Like I've said before, I tend to post things really late and I'm super tired lol.


End file.
